My Journey Home: How I Became Happier - And How You Can Too!

My Journey Home: How I Became Happier - And How You Can Too!

Around this time, 10 years ago, I was most definitely at the unhappiest point in my life; sitting in the shower of a psychiatric hospital, imagining the relief of life not continuing. From that rock bottom, I’ve embarked on a journey of transformation, marked by a series of lifestyle changes that have fundamentally reshaped my happiness. I'll share eight key changes that led me to a life filled with more joy, stability, and fulfillment. No doubt, I still have my ups and downs, but because of these lifestyle changes, they're now rooted in a higher baseline. I'm overall way happier than I was, and it took strong dedication to some intentional changes to make that happen.

Sobriety 

From the start of my journey, this was one of the most obvious and significant changes I needed to make. I started with complete sobriety for 8 continuous years. To be transparent, in the past two years, I have, on rare occasions, dabbled a bit, but soon again reached the conclusion that I’m way happier if I just don't. Rare medicinal experiences aside, substances are most often used as a distraction, and in my experience, when you distract yourself from issues, they tend to get worse. I’ve learned it’s just better to face it all with a clear mind, which brings me to meditation.

Meditation 

Meditation, particularly the vipassana practice, has simply saved my life. It gave me a path, a slow path, a path that takes patience, but a path nonetheless that has slowly cleared many of the things in my mind that no longer serve me. As a result, I’m now a much more stable, present, loving, and joyous version of myself. I continue to have immense gratitude for this practice.

Fitness 

The mind-body connection is real. Taking care of your mind also takes care of your body, and taking care of your body also takes care of your mind. Having a deeper connection with our bodies is super important and vital to our happiness, hormonal balance, emotions, and all of that. In whatever way fits your lifestyle, I strongly encourage some sort of physical activity as an essential element of your self-maintenance and well-being routine.

Community 

It is so valuable to be surrounded by positive people in positive settings. It’s motivating, supportive, emotionally gratifying, and just something we all need. In my journey, as I distanced myself from friendships that weren’t assisting my healing and growth, I knew intuitively I needed to engage in new positive communities. I joined acting classes, group fitness, rock climbing, and even became a founding organizer of a peer support group on my college campus to fulfill my own need for community and to support the need of others. It’s fairly simple: do something you’re interested in with other people.

Purpose 

Spending your time doing something you find meaningful, whether it’s creative or pursuing an interest, passion, or cause, is super important. It gives you a sense of control in your life and a sense of meaning and purpose. For me, I found it in peer support and later in making videos, and now newsletters.

Nature 

There’s something about nature vibes that are just grounding and calming. I remember in college at UC Irvine, we had a park in the middle of our campus, Aldrich Park. I still have so much gratitude for that park. Whenever the chaos of my mind or the world would get to me, I would go lie down in the grass and it would give me a space to be at ease. Get some nature every day. Even if it’s just going for a walk outside, looking at the sunset, or whatever. It’s a powerful force to connect with.

Fun 

What’s the point of being here if you’re not having fun? Do something, anything, that you find fun and playful. This one aligns really well with the whole community and finding purpose thing too. That playful energy and perspective is super valuable in making life more enjoyable.

Patience 

Be kind to yourself. Recognize that it takes time to be happier. There will be ups and downs, but part of the journey is also learning to be patient. Patience is stability. If you’re putting pressure on yourself to get happier faster, then you’re acting against the stability that is so vital to your growth and happiness.